Ape Escape 2: You're going to like
it, a lot. You'll probably hate me for not liking it. That's OK, I'm
pretty convinced that you ride the short bus if you like this game. I'll
take your criticisms in stride.
Red Alert! Red Alert! This game sucks!
Here's my opinion of the game: If you're a guy, and you're over the age
of 18, forget it. You know - pretend it doesn't exist. This game
clearly isn't for you; walk away slowly. Let the kids and
the uber-geeks have their giggle-fest, and turn SportsCenter back on. Allow
me to make this mistake for you - I got the game because of the hype, and
the nearly universal good reviews. Look for yourself - nearly EVERYONE on
EVERY board likes this game. That's because drugs are so damned
cheap. Also, most people that read and post on game boards are between the
ages of nine and fifteen. That's not a bad thing, that's a FACT, and
that's the audience for this game. At twelve and younger, I have no
problem recommending this game - a nine year old would have a blast with Ape
But frankly, I don't care about your kid. I wanted a game that I'd
enjoy. Ape Escape 2 is not that game.
Here's the story line: A bunch of monkeys are wearing
helmets. These helmets make them get into trouble. You're the idiot
that put the helmets on the monkeys in the first place. You must stop
those monkeys by capturing them with your net. Zap the monkeys first with
a stun bat, and swing away with your net. There are gadgets along
the way that help you do stuff better, like fly, swim, find the little bastards,
The graphics in Ape Escape 2 are very pastel. They're not up there with
the best of the PlayStation 2 games, but I don't think that's the point.
They are cartoon-ish, garish, very Japanese, and I'm pretty sure the developers
like it that way. I know most of the people playing the game will like it
that way. They're simplistic, and while I'm not going to fault the game
for that, I don't think I need to be singing their praises either.
Graphically, there are some "nice touches", but they grow tiresome
after a while. When you capture an Ape, it gives a fairly dramatic
animation of the capture. That one isn't too bad, especially if you've
been chasing a monkey around for 2-3 minutes. The animation that gets on
my nerves is the one at the beginning and end of each level. It's this
teleport animation that looks cool the first or second time that you play, but
gets SO repetitive that you'll want to put your fist through the TV.
The camera system sucks. I'm not going to get too mad about that,
because the camera system sucks in most platformers. But - be prepared to
get stuck behind walls and crap like that.
In Ape Escape 2, there is a lot of talking. There's nothing worth
noting that's either good or bad, other than it sounds like a badly acted
cartoon. To be precise, the speech is like a Yu-Gi-Oh cartoon or any other
Fox Box cartoon; it's overacted and simple.
The control scheme is different enough from other platformers that there is a
bit of a learning curve. Both analog sticks are used in character control
- one for a weapon (a net, as there isn't any real violence in this game), and
the other to move your character. It won't take you too long to get used
to the control scheme, and the levels start out fairly easy to give you time to
learn the controls.
You don't need a walkthrough for Ape Escape 2. You get a gadget, and
then you use that gadget on the very next level. If not that, then the
environments make it obvious which gadgets you should be using (in
water... you'd use the water gadget. To get up high, you use the
helicopter). There are also a million audio tutorials, enough to be
annoying as hell. Given all of that, you'll whiz through the first few
levels without even breaking a sweat.
Here's what every other web site is saying about Ape Escape 2:
- It's got an innovative control scheme. This makes the game fun.
- IT'S GOT MONKEYS!! WHO DOESN'T LIKE MONKEYS!?!? (anyone
seen where I put my public hair?)
- Oh, my God - you guys totally missed out on this game that didn't sell
well, called Ape Escape. Dude, we even put it on our "best of all
time list". We have to give this game a good review, both cause
we're sheep, and because it proves our streed cred.
- We can't put our finger on it, but it's just... fun!
I call Sony-induced shenanigans.
what I say about Ape Escape 2:
- If I play one more obviously Japanese game, with whacked-out Japanese
crack smoking, stuff-me-into-the-subway, watch too much anime,
pastel-til-you-puke design schemes, I'm just going to lose it.
- The control scheme is unique, but it's not some fantastic leap of
science. Instead of using the right stick to control your camera, you
use it to control your weapon. Big whoop.
- Screw the monkeys. Monkeys were fun in Monkey Ball, not because of
the monkeys, but because you could look PAST the monkeys and enjoy a GREAT
multi-player experience. This game is just you, monkeys, funny looks
from your significant other, and your buddies mocking you when they see you
playing the game.
- Screw your street cred.
- This is a kids game. It's not universally appealing. It's also
not so different that it deserves a lot of attention. It's not all
that fun, because it's repetative.
Overall, I didn't like Ape Escape 2. It is a game meant for kids; girls
or boys. That's fine, but I'm not a kid, and my heart is black as coal.
I give Ape Escape 2 a 5/10 - it doesn't live up to the hype, and while
competently executed, it doesn't really do anything new.